Trials and Tribulations...

Poor Kitty

2009-02-06T13:00:20Z

My cat, Kaktus, sheds a lot. He's 9 years old - will be 10 this spring. He's a calm and cuddly old cat. Never moves much. My partner and I usually joke that "Whoah careful there, you wouldn't want to strain yourself!" Whenever he gets up, to lie down in a different position. But yeah, he sheds a lot. In the morning he comes up to me in the bed and cuddles next to my pillow. His purring reverberates throughout the mattress and can be heard no matter how you lie with your head. It has a very calming effect on me. But he sheds - which leads to frequent changes of bed linens. And that's okay.

I adopted Kaktus and the one year younger Taktur from a friend of mine, who couldn't take them to where she was moving. They are indoor cats, and considering how much they shed I've been wondering why we've never seen a single furball coughed up. And we haven't. Ever.

Until today.

Poor kitty. Both of the cats talk. Taktur talks considerably more than Kaktus, but lately Kaktus has become more vocal as well. I've gotten used to the sounds, and I have learned to discern Taktur's morning call of "There's no more food in the bowl, get your ass out of bed and feed me!" from his "I'm cranky because Kaktus took my chair. Comfort me by giving me more attention!" Similarly I have learned to discern Kaktus' "I'm feeling cuddly, is there roo for me in the bed/couch?" from his "Taktur's being a bully, and I'm tired of staring him down, poor meeee."

And this afternoon, suddenly I heard Kaktus say something I'd never heard before. It was the most unhappy, desperate plea I'd ever heard him utter. He sounded completely miserable. I was sitting on the couch with a bowl of yoghurt and cereal, so I just had to put that on the table. And doing that, I heard the follow up sound coming from out by the front door. The unmistakable sound of hurling. And yep, when I got there I just saw poor Kaktus get rid of the last of his puke. He looked up and me and had an apology written all over his face. He was so miserable. And the brave little kitty had been so considerate as to puke on the door mat, so it was easy for me to just dump it in the shower and wash it. I don't know if he intended for that, but I do think he's more intelligent than he lets on.

And he's just been sitting around, not touching food for the last two hours now. I've only had him since September, so I don't know if he's ever had to puke to pass a furball before (and yes, there was a furball in there). I just know that I'll pribably never forget the sound he made just before he puked. He sounded so heart-broken it nearly broke mine.

Philosophy

2008-08-04T18:22:57Z

You scored as a Existentialism
Your life is guided by the concept of Existentialism: You choose the meaning and purpose of your life.

“Man is condemned to be free; because once thrown into the world, he is responsible for everything he does.”
“It is up to you to give [life] a meaning.”
--Jean-Paul Sartre

“It is man's natural sickness to believe that he possesses the Truth.”
--Blaise Pascal

More info at Arocoun's Wikipedia User Page...
Existentialism
95%
Hedonism
65%
Utilitarianism
65%
Kantianism
60%
Justice (Fairness)
60%
Nihilism
25%
Strong Egoism
10%
Apathy
0%
Divine Command
0%

Funny Quote of the Week

2008-07-30T16:01:46Z

I have no idea who said it, and I've translated it from Danish, so bear with me. I love it :D

"Of all musical instruments the banjo is the one that most resembles the human voice, it merely lacks the ferocity of the harp."

Laugh with me, people.

Oh yeah, I'm thinking of buying a harp, that's why I remembered this one.

Internet again

2008-07-18T03:59:40Z

Wooot!

It only took them two weeks to not set up my connection in the new place. So I called them yesterday and asked what the hell was going on.

They were all "Oh something seems to have gone wrong in the process. We'll fix it now."

Well, gee, thanks. But now it's all working fine, and I'm back online.

Relocating

2008-06-05T10:42:30Z

I have grown tired of LJ, so I am moving all my political and otherwise opinionated posts to wordpress.

You can find me at jemimaaslana.wordpress.com I hope to see you there.

Some people...

2008-04-17T10:19:08Z

...ought to have their driver's license revoked.

I got home from running a few errands just now and drove into the parking lot next to my building. I did see that another car was leaving the parking lot next to the one I'd entered. I thought it would be leaving the way I'd come. So I enter the parking lot, and I drive slowly because I'm used to kids playing there. I kept to the right because I was aiming to get a spot to my left, and admittedly I did not look in my rear view mirror, so I didn't see anything. This side of the parking lot was empty, so I could just pick and choose the spot I wanted, I did and as I turned left I sudenly see that other car coming up next to me on my left.

Goddammit!

I stepped on the brakes and the woman in the car gave ME a very angry look as SHE drove across the marked parking spots passing me only to exit the parking lot while I was still sitting there rather shocked at what the moron did.

A parking lot for fuck's sake! People usually go there to park. Don't tell me you're surprised I turned my car towards a spot designated for parking. Don't tell me you're surprised I meant to park along the marked lines. As opposed to driving across them, you fuckwit!

Damn.

I just needed to vent. What an idiot. And she had the nerve to look angrily at me, as if I'm the one driving outside the lanes, being too impatient to wait for them to park and instead overtake them disregarding that they may actually be trying to park where I intend to drive.

ARGH

Stupid harebrain.

Downtime

2008-03-11T21:33:50Z

I haven't been terribly active lately. Things have been going on in my personal life, among them is (for once) a happy fact. Namely that I have now started dating the man I've been interested in for quite a while. There's a lot of new discoveries to be made with this, and I'm spending a lot of time with him these days.

I apologize for the temporary hibernation. I'll be back in more consistent activity asap.

Spring?

2008-02-10T14:44:09Z

It's early February. The weather ought to be cold and wet, possibly even with heavy snows. But no. We have high sun and it's actually fairly warm. 14 degrees Celsius is nice, and I decided to go spend some time writing on a bench in the park. As it turned out the wind was a tad too cold for it to be really comfortable, but just as I was concocting parts of my next blog entry there were sirens. Sitting between seven 11+ story buildings it was difficult for me to pin-point where the hell they were coming from. I shrugged it off and figured they would pass by on the main street nearby soon thereafter.

But no. Suddenly I could hear exactly where they were coming from. Approximately at the same time as a little boy shouted "Look! A firetruck!" the sound could pass directly from the source to my ears inbetween the buildings, and bloody hell they were right next to one of the apartment blocks. Not mine, thankfully. I got my things and went over there to see what the hell was going on, and as more came into view it was the whole shebang. Engine, ladder, water tank parked beneath the building where smoke was wafting from a flat on the 6th floor (I think it was). It wasn't much smoke, thankfully, so it probably wasn't a real bad fire, but bad enough to be noticable from the outside, because no one had been home. That was pretty clear from the fact that the fire fighters removed a little dog from the flat, but no one else. The poor creature was shaking and very scared.

The trucks left just now and I've been reminded of my childhood ambition of becoming a fire fighter :P

Considerate behaviour

2008-02-01T18:01:23Z

In the bus on my way home today, I saw the blind man and his black lab guide dog. I see him quite often on the bus routes I use. He usually sits in the front seat. Today at the central station, it was after 5 PM, and by then there's a bus every hour instead of every 20 minutes. That means the bus fills up more than usual. There were still plenty of empty seats in the back, I counted at least 10.

Anyway, I had found a seat towards the back of the bus, and was just sitting there waiting for the clock to show 18:10 so we could leave the station. Sitting there I had plenty of opportunity to observe my fellow passengers. Among them an old lady, she looked older than 60 but younger than my granma who's 85, who got on the bus and asked the blind man if she could sit next to him.

Now, this may not seem so strange in a bus that's slowly becoming packed. But here's the kicker. The seats are two and two, the regular bus kind. There isn't much leg room, and not much room under the seats either. The man had a dog, remember? Big black lab. The dog was sitting on the floor in fron of the window seat and the man sat on the aisle seat, thus blocking two seats, which is perfectly fine, and totally allowed because you know... people do need to have their dogs with them, especially blind people who depend on a guide dog.

But this lady was pretty much trying to squeeze her way past the man into the window seat next to him, while asking him if she could take that seat. Waiting for an answer? Nope. The man asked her: where should I sit then? And she replied, something to the effect of "right where you are". It was as if she hadn't even seen his dog. And geez...

The man got up and she immediately tried to mosey into the window seat, but nearly stepped on the dog that the man had to get out of there first. The man, and remember he's blind - or at least with bad enough eye sight to require a guide dog - just stands there helpless trying to lock in on two empty seats in the bus. Two because the dog needs to be there, too. And believe me, there really isn't room for a dog much larger than a big Jack Russell under those seats, much less a lab. And then a girl, I guess she was 16 or thereabouts gets up and offers him the seat she'd been occupying. There was an empty seat next to her, so he'd have the room for is dog that he needed. And she goes to sit next to the old lady.

The girl had been sitting RIGHT BEHIND HIM all the time. The old lady could just as easily have moved two short steps further down the aisle and sat down next to the girl, but noooo she absolutely had to have the seat the man and his dog were occupying.

Excuse me but: what the fucking fuck? I seem to recall the elderly complaining how young people nowadays don't have any manners blah blah blah. Well whaddaya know, perhaps we learned that from our grannies. Or then again, perhaps some old people are so full of entitlement bullshit that they forget to actually look at reality. The man was BLIND, and the lady has to chase him out of his seat, practically forcing her way past and over him. I was so appalled, is this the generation that claims mine has no manners? I beg to differ. That girl, though she was younger than me I consider her my own generation, was considerably more considerate than that old harpy.

I dunno what that goes to show, but I needed to vent my outrage. Plenty of times have I seen people get up and offer their seats to the blind man, or to people who are obviously not walking all that well. In the first days after I injured my foot and was limping badly there were people offering me - a young, otherwise healthy-looking person - their seat. Some of them were people who were much older than me, I wasn't too pleased about feeling like a cripple who needed extra help, but I was damn grateful that they let me have a seat, when all I wanted was a bed, a blanket, and a good solid bout of swearing.

And this? This just takes the biscuit. A blind man hounded out of his seat because some old woman has decided that she wants that seat and none other.

Bah! I say.

A terrier thing...

2008-01-09T22:42:21Z

I don't know if it is, but I just saw an airedale mix on Animal Cops Houston and it behaved in exactly the same way as my folks' Irish terrier when petted. The exact same movements, the exact same mimicry. It's difficult to describe exactly what it is, but this dog, though much bigger, was so similar to Kian in mannerisms. It's scary. I wonder if it really is a terrier thing, or if it's just two dogs that coincidentally are very similar.

Work injury

2008-01-07T14:07:18Z

On Friday I was involved in an accident at work. I was picking wares in the narrow aisle storage and I arranged with the narrow aisle turret truck driver to be in the same aisle. It was even her idea that I go down in the aisle she was working in, I had originally meant to wait for her to finish. But I went down there on her suggestion, she'd wait for me to finish instead. 5 minutes later she'd forgotten. I was standing between my pallet and my own truck when she drove into the aisle and pushed the pallet into my foot, getting it stuck between said pallet and my truck.

I screamed. Partly because it hurt like fuck, partly because I was panicking.

Thankfully, she heard me and stopped the truck and hurried out of the aisle. I was still stuck between the 150+ kilo pallet and my 4-ton truck. And neither were budging. Others came running to. First person on the scene was T, who first went to me to help me. I told him (or more like shouted in my panicky state) to move my truck, which he did so I could get my foot free. He heped me to sit down and took my shoe and sock off to check if there was anything to be done here and now ie. bleeding that needed to be stopped.

B showed up with an empty pallet and drove me to the office where the first aid kit is. An ice bag was applied to my foot which was turning blue and black. Transportation to the hospital was arranged for and then I could just sit there and wait. It would be a regular car, since this was hardly enough of an emergency to call for an ambulance.

After about 30 minutes my transport arrived and once again I was driven through the warehouse on a pallet to the gate where the car was parked. And in all the pain I had a stroke of luck. The man I've been crushing on was the one to help on and off the pallet and to the car. I know next to nothing about him, but I find him extremely appealing for some reason, and leaning heavily on him I had myself a nice grope hehe. I would've liked to hang onto him a while longer but I was heading to the ER, besides there were too many people around for what I would really have liked to do anyway. *cheeky grin*

I was brought to the ER, was put to bed, got a new ice bag and then I could just lay there waiting. I wasn't an emergency so those who came in with ambulances obviously had priority. I wasn't exactly dying. It just hurt like fuck. At first I refused the nurse's offer of pain meds, but eventually she convinced me to take them. It didn't help all that much, but it was a slight relief.

After almost an hour and a half the doctor came to see me. Dr. Safar, cute young doc, probably of Middle-Eastern descent judging from looks, accent and name. Yum. He examined my foot with the usual "does it hurt when I press here"-routine, and then sent me to x-ray. There was more waiting there, and I needed to pee. But I was just lying on my hospital bed not knowing where the nearest toilet was, nor how much longer I actually would have to wait before it was my turn. So I couldn't really leave. Finally it was my turn.

The radiologist was also of Middle-Eastern or Balkan descent, though this man was probably around 50, so not so cute. It must be a thankless job to be a radiologist, having to twist patients' limbs into rather uncomfortable positions in order to get the right angles for the pictures. So I was sitting there, in pain and looking like shat out apple stew as we say around these parts, and when he was done he called for a porter to take a beautiful young lass back to the ER to see the doc who attended her. Any idiot could tell that beautiful was probably the last adjective that could truthfully be applied to me then and there, but it was heart-warming nonetheless. Some might think it was just a pervy old man being leery and lecherous, but his kind smile and the comforting humour in his eyes contradict such suspicions. He was a very professional doctor who knew that harmless and somewhat silly little compliments presented with humour can be just the thing a worried ER patient needs. It sure made me feel better. Heck, I knew I looked like something the cat had dragged in and proceeded to chew on for quite some time, and it was a real nice gesture.

I was taken back down to the ER, where Dr. Safar had had a look at my x-rays and had found nothing to be broken or otherwise displaced. The pain from having my foot squeezed would probably last me a while, and he gave me instructions on how to care for my sprained ankle - nothing much I didn't already know, I've sprained ankles, wrists and fingers regularly on my path through life. I can go back to work when I can do so without causing myself any pain, that was his final judgement. Then a nurse gave me a tetanus shot, which I haven't had since I was 3 or so, and forgot to mention that there'd be some pain from that for some days. So I didn't think it'd matter in which side she shot me up with the vaccine, I thought it'd be like any other vaccine. So she picked the side where she was standing, obviously. That was my right side - it was administered in the upper arm - and that was that, I thought. Until at night when I lay down to sleep, intending to sleep on my right side so's to prevent my right foot from lying on top of my injured left foot. But that was impossible because that tetanus shot hurts like fuck, still. There's obviously a process going on beneath the skin, but wow it hurts. Sort of like a bruise only deeper down. I'd have liked to know that.

Ah well, the nurse also bandaged my foot and 20 minutes after the shot was administered I was allowed to leave the premises. My employer's subscription to patient transportation ensured that I could get a cab home on their bill, rather than having to take the bus. That would've been a pain, since they didn't give me crutches. The doctor explained that crutches allow the sprained ankle to hang limp in the ligaments that were injured and thereby slow the healing process, so it makes sense to not hand them out. But because of the cushing injury to my forefoot I couldn't support my weight on my foot at all, so I did a lot of limping and hopping on one leg. But at least I hadn't broken anything.

I was home by 4.45 in the afternoon. Very tired and all cried out. Called my folks informed them of what had happened, and I called my friend M and informed him as well. I'm not on prescription pain meds, but I was told I should just take what I normally take if I felt it was necessary. Saturday morning I did, but they don't make much of a difference, and as it turned out, the foot hurs more the longer I've been sitting still with it. So it appears the trick is to keep moving it, excercising the ankle. It hurts like fuck in the morning, and I wouldn't want to attempt climbing into my truck, but gimme a week's time or so and I should be able to go back to work, unless I have seriously misjudged how fast this will heal. The doc would probably recommend a longer recuperation time, but I usually heal pretty fast and if I can get tasks that won't require me to climb in and out of the truck all the time, all day I should be fine. But we'll see.

Once I return to work I'll also have to fill out a report of the work injury, so if I get complications later on related to this injury it won't count as normal sickness but will be on the work injury 'budget'.

But wow, what a day. And what a shock. Come Sunday I'd gotten over the shock, and today I've come to a point where I'm fairly settled down about it all. The doc was confident there'd be no lasting damage.

Though the black and blue-ness of the initial injury is long since disipated, the blood from the burst cappilaries did have to go somewhere. It spread out in my foot so from the damaged area and all the way out to my toes my left has taken on a light blue-ish colour, loking mostly like it's very cold and close to developing frost-bite. Looks freaky, but it's nothing to worry about, I've seen displaced bruises before hehe.

For now, I'm trying to enjoy a few extra days off without the joy of being able to go anywhere. *growl* I get bored easily when I don't have the option of leaving my home, and I get very impatient when I can't walk very fast - a graceless hobble is all I can manage without any pain - and so I end up trying to walk faster and then end up hurting myself. And knowing me I'm more likely to just ignore the pain and keep walking, so I better not start doing that at all. I'll just end up making things worse. So I'm sitting on my couch, frustrated that I can't do much of anything useful.

Codex Alimentarius

2008-01-05T22:37:35Z

I lifted this from one of the blogs I frequent, who had lifted it from a friend. I am frankly quite concerned, so help us spread the word:

"This concerns YOUR health, and YOUR life, not to mention your (future) children...

Ok, put your hand up anyone who's heard of the Codex Alimentarius?

No one?

Neither had I. But it's going to have a huge impact on your lives, make no mistake.

Here is a video about it: http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-5266884912495233634&pr=goog-sl

And a website (yes it's American, yes it's relevant to you as well): http://www.healthfreedomusa.org/index.php

Another one: http://www.natural-health-information-centre.com/codex-alimentarius.html

And the "official" one: http://www.codexalimentarius.net/web/index_en.jsp

PLEASE LOOK AT THE OTHER ONES FIRST SO YOU KNOW WHAT TO LOOK FOR IN THE OFFICIAL ONE.

If you're unable to view the other websites, or the video, or you're just plain lazy, let me summarise. The Codex Alimentarius Commission is the World Health Organisation and United Nations working with the World Trade Organisation and pharmaceutical companies and banks to control food standards. The WTO and pharmaceutical companies and banks, as you may have guessed, have no interest in protecting the consumer. They control things like the level of pesticides in food that are acceptable, which antibiotics/steroids/growth hormones can be fed to animals intended for consumption, guidelines for vitamins & minerals, some labelling of food.

According to the Codex Alimentarius, vitamins and minerals are now classed as "toxins", and as such we must be protected from them. Do you or anyone you know have the desire to be protected from vitamin C? Under their guidelines, any amount of vitamin/mineral/herb that produces a noticeable effect on someone's wellbeing will be forbidden (For example, Vitamin C over 200mg). I thought the point of nutrients was that they produced a noticeable effect, no? And since when were NUTRIENTS (essential for life and functioning etc) classed as toxins? Obviously too much of anything is toxic (even water), and there are limits, but shouldn't that make either ALL food and drink toxins, or NONE?

Under the Codex Alimentarius ALL cattle will be given growth hormones, and antibiotics. ALL animals intended for consumption will be given antibiotics. ALL meat intended for consumption will be irradiated. That includes "organic" food.

Under the Codex Alimentarius, any GMO will not require a label, so you will not know whether you are eating genetically modified plants or not.

Any country that does not follow the Codex Alimentarius guidelines will have massive trade sanctions imposed on it. Britain is definitely going to follow them, as is America, and most of Europe. It supersedes all laws the countries have on food standards, and will reduce our access to information about the food we eat. It will effectively gut the alternative medicine industry, and deprive people of options. Any nutrient or herb over a certain dose will either be illegal, or have to be bought at grossly inflated prices on prescription from pharmaceutical companies.

This will come into effect in 2009, and it's been worked towards for over 40 years. If you're not worried... well, you should be.

I do not know everything about the Codex Alimentarius, and don't claim to. I'm just sharing some stuff that I only stumbled across in the last couple of days. I think people have a right to know what's going on with their food and health. I certainly want to know what's being done to my food, and if any of my healthcare options are being taken away from me. It may seem like I'm talking about some sort grossly exaggerated doomsday theory, but I don't believe I am. You can check all my sources, and help me out if you believe I'm wrong. I just want to know the truth.

Here's a European petition about the Codex Alimentarius: http://www.laleva.cc/petizione/english/intro_eng.html

Spread this around. Talk."

2007

2008-01-01T13:29:57Z

Sitting here watching the New Year's Concert from Vienna I suddenly had the urge to write about the year we've left behind.

Last year at this time I was still seething about the way my father treated me at Christmas lunch the 25th. And the way he justified his abysmal behaviour in a mail sent on New Year's Eve, which I spent alone. It was not the first time he insulted me and put me down, and in my life of 23 years I have yet to receive an apology from him. I will never have it, I had to realise that, and I will have to resign myself to never be able to truly consider my father my dad.

I had been suffering from insomnia for 1½ months due to a combo of stress and depression. This would last until my exams were over and don with in January and we could start the new semester in February. Normally I'm not one to stress out because of an exam/paper, but the semester we finished last winter saw me settled with 3 classes, 1 of which was far too hard for me, 1 of which was exactly up my alley and 1 of which was not in my line of interest, and therefore held topics I did not have background knowledge of which was necessary. Two thirds of my finals were murder and a scored the lowest average yet in my time at uni. Why had I chosen two subjects so unsuited for me, you might wonder? Well, I had to choose three from a list of three.

The next semester starting in February I would only have 2 subjects. I could choose those two from a list of three. There was a Charles Dickens subject I was very interested in, and a linguistics subject I felt likewise about. But alas, there were too few applicants for the linguistics course and it wasn't even started. So in order to have two classes I had to take the third on the list - it was a History subject, my absolutely worst category. I'm not interested in it, and especially not in the topic we'd be working with here. I could look forward to another semester in which I wouldn't get to work with what I'd like. The whole concept of specializing our degree is moot when they cannot offer what we want to specialize in.

I started the semester, after having bougt a new laptop to replace the computer that burned itself out a week after my last exam, determined to at least give it a shot. But come April I had spent so much time working so hard on things I couldn't care less about, that I was thoroughly sick of it all. I wanted no more to do with university, it had not lived up to my expectations in the long run, though it had seemed very well in the first semesters.

I decided to quit. Then started my careful planning. When you quit an edu here you also have to quit the student housing, so I stayed on until I was sure I had something to move into. That would obviously not come for free, so I had to have a job as well since the state funded support for students would also disappear when I would no longer be a student. One of my friends got me the storage facility job I now have. Before I started there, however, I was working on the usual satirical stage show, we were in the middle of rehearsals.

Once rehearsal period was over, I quit my edu officially, and moved into my new flat on the 1st of June. A week later I started at the storage facility. Another week later my new laptop, my poetry book, my wallet with money, plastic, bus pass etc was stloen from the backstage area on the show.

That triggered the worst summer I've had in a long time. It was a very hard blow to my creativity, because having just moved I didn't have money to buy a new computer. Depression took hold and I wasn't doing very well - and that's putting it mildly. I gained a lot of weight that I have sadly yet to get rid of.

My brother came through. He mobilised family and friends and they all pitched in to help me out financially where insurance would not (because the backstage area hadn't been locked - it was a tent, duh), thanks to them I could buy me a new computer and get back into writing, as had been my ambition when I quit uni.

I found it harder than I had expected. My long break had brought me out of my routines and it was far more difficult to find them again than I had first expected. As the days went by I had to realise that I didn't have many people left to talk to. Though I hadn't formed any close friendships at university the stimulation I'd gotten from talking to like-minded people there was sorely missed. Though my co-workers at the storage faciliy are nice and all we have nothing in common. Their interests are not mine, mine are not theirs, we have nothing to talk about other than work, and my enthusiasm for making changes in a place I don't intend to remain is non-existant at best.

My work hours are unnatural to my normal day rhythm, and thus when I'm at home with the time to write my body wants nothing other than sleep. Not exactly conducive to creativity and productive doings. On top of that my social circle has dwindled. With no university acquaintances, no more involvement in the church choir, and not being online when my o/l friends are I don't have many people left to talk to. Frankly I've been feeling lonely the past few months, and that isn't helping either.

I still teach the RP class at the youth school and will continue doing so, hopefully next semester I'll have a writer's workshop to teach as well. It'll earn me another small sum, but it won't get me more of a social circle.

Currently I'm looking for ways to put together a living of several smaller jobs, but that'll net me no security at all, and I don't know if I'm willing to risk that. So I'm thinking hard about what to do with myself and my life right now, 'cause the way things look at the moment I'll be going out of my mind all too soon.

New Years Eve

2007-12-31T13:26:08Z

Since I'm having the fam over for New Years, I'm preparing tonight's dinner already. I figured it'd be smarter to have the bread out of the oven in good time so it won't clash with the two other things I need the oven for tonight.

So I was standing there mixing the dough for the pane con prosciutto, and I notice that as always I need 15 grams of yeast. It's always 15 grams, or for larger portions 30. Yet it always comes in packs of 50? Why? I checked my recipes, almost every single one of them uses 15 or 30 grams of yeast. Why te packs of 50? It's so impractical.

I've also been experiementing hehe So I've been writing down a recipe so I can recreate the processif my experiment turns out to be good enough to use again someday.

Hehe impro dinner :D

On another note: it appears to be frosty outside, still. That's good, it means we'll have a clear night sky for the fireworks tonight. W00tness!

RIP Benazir Bhutto

2007-12-28T00:46:38Z

http://www.nytimes.com/2007/12/28/world/asia/28pakistan.html?_r=1&hp&oref=slogin

One of the most vocal opponents of Pakistan's military rule has been killed. A proponent of democracy and human rights, speaking up even when faced with threats from government and civilian radicals alike Benazir Bhutto had a great deal of my respect, and I've been following the news about her since she returned to her homeland even though she knew it would be dangerous. She believed she would be more of a help by being right there where her opinions mattered the most.

I don't know if she was right. I hope she was, if not her death will have been in vain. I hope her death will not just be shrugged off as another casualty of political disagreements as happens so often. I hope that the media coverage of Bhutto and her legacy will prevent oblivion from swallowing Pakistan's turmoil, while some fight for democracy and others struggle to keep hold of the power.

It's bloody unbelievable. One of the really great profiles in the fight for democracy and human rights is gone. I hope she will not leave a void, but that others will continue the struggle and not give up.

Shedding a tear for yet another dead soldier, I shall turn in considerably more somber than when I decided to check the news.

News suck, and yet I wouldn't do without them. Else how would anyone know when they were needed to fill a recently opened position? I hear Pakistan's in need of a strong opposition leader, anyone volunteering?

Why are you a feminist?

2007-12-22T20:58:52Z

If I've talked politics or religion with people for a while it's likely that I've let them know I'm a feminist. Some have found that fact surprising, and they usually proced to ask me why. Indeed, why am I a feminist? Simple. I believe women ought to have equal rights and equal standing in our society. Then they usually roll their eyes and say what I was thinking, namely 'duh'. And then they ask what they had actually meant to ask in the first place: "Do you honestly think it's still necessary?" To that I can only say: "Do you honestly have to ask?" Meaning two things. One: If I didn't think feminism was still necessary, I probably wouldn't be writing and arguing about women's rights under a feminist banner as much as I do, now would I? Two: Look around you, do you honestly thing we've achieved those two things I mentioned?

I found a wonderful example as to why I'm still fighting this battle in the newspaper of December 17th. It's a free newspaper that everyone gets so it doesn't exactly have the really awesome indepth articles (those I'll hi-jack at my folks'), but it has the news and it doesn't pretend to have more than that, so that's cool. Now, let me just point out: I live in Denmark, we may have a right-wing government, but we are far more progressive when it comes to women's rights than for instance the US, which takes up a lot of the writing space when it cmes to feminist issues. We've had legal abortion for several decades, and while there's time-limit as to how late you can have an abortion, it is free for all and it is an integral part of our universal health care system. Not an exception to it. Since the abortion issue is one of the really big ones when it comes to women's rights one would think that when we have that one more or less settled, what other problems could there be here?

The newspaper on December 17th has this:
Front page headline: Feminine jobs pay considerably less than masculine jobs. Two common jobs are compared, that f a welder and that of a nursing home carer. The educations required for either job are of equal length and yet the difference in pay is: 18 %
A right-wing politician objects that one cannot compare jobs just like that. He says that the nursing home carer's position comes with certain benefits that are worth quite a lot if translated to currency, and he exemplifies with..... wait for it.... better maternity leave! As if that's something really awesomely fashionably modern. It's a traditional feminine occupation, they have *had* to make decent maternity leave deals because 96 % of their employees are women.

He also claims that the nursing home carers have a better work environment. Oh really? Well, their work environment is likely a good bit cleaner than the welder's, but better? I don't know about that. It's different. The welder's environment will depend greatly upon where he works. Welding is used in small facilites where one welder will do many different things, welding is also used in large shipyards where the work can be very monotonous, not to mention the level of noise in different work places can be very diverse. Thus, welding is not a uniform thing that can just be compared. What about the carers? Some of them work in the rivate homes of the elderly, that means where stairs are not built for ease of access, where there are no elevators if you need to take the heavy vaccum cleaner with you to the 2nd floor, where there are no aids for lifting a person who has fallen down, where there is a lot of smoke or other things one might be allergic to or that are simply unhealthy. Additionally, having visited family members in nursing homes I have seen just how physically and verbally abusive the 'inmates' in such nursing homes can be. It may not break the carers' bones nor outright kill them like accidents in a shipyard could a welder, but it can break them mentally and it does in many cases. Not to mention the fact that there is a lot of criticism of how these carers do their jobs, even though the allotted time for each task is often ridiculously brief.

This article takes up pages 4 and 5. The wages up for comparison are these:
Welder: Hourly pay including pension: 183.36 DKK
Carer: Hourly pay including pension: 149.78 DKK

And these are also including those additional fees for potentially damaging work environments etc etc

Now, if we compare them including benefits such as paid vacation, maternity/paternity leave and sick leave it look like this:
Welder: 231.27 DKK
Carer: 193.43 DKK

The difference is even bigger! What exactly was this politicians point about the carer's maternity leave being better? It may well be but apparently either the sick leave or the paid vacation cancels it out. What does that tell us? One: that he's wrong about the value of those benefits and two: that apparently benefits such as vacation and leave is worth less when it's a woman needing it.

Besides, the welde can go home in weekends. He might have the opportunity to work weekends and earn extra, but few industries here work all through the weekend. Very few indeed. But the carers? Well, people don't stop needing care just because you want to spend your weekend with your family. Just like hospitals don't close on weekends, for which I'm sure most people are very grateful. So that was one issue.

Headline on page two of this newspaper: Midwives protest.
A hospital has decided to cut funding for their maternity ward. That means less preparatory counselling, which means more fear before giving birth. It means the counselling for parents of a stillborn, the special offers for those pregnant with twins or more, plus counselling for rape and incest victims who are pregnant will all be closed.

Obviously the midwives who are there to give pre as well as post-natal care are unhappy that they cannot have the funds to do their jobs properly, so they have gathered signatures and protest vocally. The director of the hospital is reported to be impressed with the support for the maternity ward but as he says: "We don't have enough money, so we must prioritize. It's a shame about the pre-natal counselling and I pity those with special needs, but they must look for other options, because we prioritize safety for those giving birth."

Yeah, 'cause they really need his pity. And they may not be giving birth right now, but in a few months they will, so wha kind of bull was that? And if prioritizing those giving birth means not preparing them properly for the ordeal and therefore causing more to choose epidurals and c-sections that might not have been necessary I really don't want to see what it would be like if they were not prioritized. Ack!

On page 6 a journalist gives his opinion on how the new female head of the Church Ministry has been conspicuously silent when it comes to the issue of some male preachers refusing to shake hands with female preachers, and the story about how the bishop needed several months to decide whether that was acceptable or not. If this church was its own institution they could act however they'd like for all I care. But this church is the one whose employes are paid by the state ad supposedly should have room for everyone, and as long as the state pays their salaries it should bloody well be up to the state to tell them not to discriminate, the journalist writes. This male journalist finds it very disconcerting that the female Secretary of the Church Ministry as not yet said a word on the treatment of female ministers.

I find it very disconcerting that a male journalist reacts to tis discrimination before a female politician does. And this particular politician is usually one of the most loud-mouthed ones who really dare to tell it like it is. Perhaps getting the post as Secretary of a ministry has taken the fight out of her.

On page 9 we find the headline: Porn sells t-shirts

There's not any porn on the t-shirts themselves, but the ad for the site selling the t-shirts has a photo taken from a man's view down at his penis and a woman kneeling in front of him, obviouslyjust about to give him a blowjob. The woman's eyes have been covered with an 'anonymity bar' with the text t-shirtlounge.dk, and the ad text says: "New t-shirts have cumed"

The advertiser defends his ad saying: "It's irony" Obviously he has no clue what irony is. Actually, him saying that it is irony is ironic because it's not irony.

For those who deperately need to view the picture: you can go check it out at http://t-shirtlounge.dk

Page 10 headline: Cleaning aid for the lazy stay-at-home-dad
The article is about a small robot that can help with the domestic duties. It's nothing more fancy than a vacuum cleaner that does the work without needing to be handled manually. Just tart it and it'll do its job.
The article as such does not have any feminist issues at first glance but think on this:
1. Who usually does the cleaning? Who usually needs a hand with the housework? It's usually the women, even though they work fulltime like their husbands. But a headline saying: "Cleaning aid for the busy woman" just wouldn't appeal to the right audience because....
2. It's a technological gadget and we all know women don't dig that, so even though women are those most in need of this aide, we'll address the men about it.

All I can say is: What the fuck?

Page 12 headline: Bill Clinton to save his wife's campaign

Isn't it rather impressve that the key person here, namely the one running for the presidency has been reduced to less than a name? Hillary Clinton is Bill's wife, she's not a senator, she's not a politician, she's not a potential presidential candidate. Nope, she's Bill's wife. It's a little thing, but it's oh so telling.

All these items in one single newspaper. And people wonder why we still need feminism? I'd say it's obvious. But I guess you need to actually care before you start bothering with truly reading and understanding the news. Thus in the end the answer to the question in the headline becomes: Because I care. That's why.

Journalists say the funniest things

2007-12-19T15:58:52Z

I was just watching a news report on the telly and they were briefly mentioning the fire in the building where Bush and Cheney have their offices. The journalist reported that "...Cheney was not in his office when the fire broke out, but the building was evacuated nonetheless."

LMAO I don't even think she noticed what she said. But OMG I'm still chuckling like a maniac.

Speaking of linguistic mistakes:
The Danish word for cancer is only one letter away from the word for force. I don't recall who the otherwise very good article was about, but it called the woman a 'cancer of nature'. A rather unfortunate mistake, if I do say so myself.

More deception

2007-12-19T14:44:57Z

Genesis 28. The story of Esau and Jacob. One thing is how Isaac favours one son over the other and would one with everything and the other with nothing. Ye ancient customs aside Jacob gets Isaac's blessing and his promises of the entire inheritance on a pretense of being Esau, that is apparently acceptable. In the Bible a contract/promise is not void even if it was made based upon a lie. That means that it doesn't matter how well they can prove I'm not the grand daughter of the long lost Anastasia of the Russian tzar family, if one of the Romanovs promised me their fortune thinking I was family, then the fortune is mine.

Do you even realise how con artists would love living in this world? It's ridiculous.

What's worse in the Biblical story is that Esau actually has to plead with his father to convince him that he can at least give him his blessing. Isaac was at first unwilling to bless his own son. Wow, what a caring father he was. It's not like it takes a lot out of him to do that, but Esau has to plead for it, even as Isaac has been deceived and has given a blessing to someone he never intended, he must be convinced how he should bless the one he originally intended.

Yeah, the Bible is truly the paragon of family values.

First long con in the history of the world

2007-12-16T17:57:03Z

No, I'm not going into the issue of whether the Bible is true or not. I wouldn't dream of it. But I've decided to sit down and read the Bible from one end to the other. And I just read the story of Abram and Sarai in Egypt. How Abram tells Sarai to join in on the deception that she is his sister rather than his wife, as he suspects the Egyptians would otherwise kill him to win the beautiful Sarai. So eventually Pharaoh attempts to buy Abram's 'sister' with cattle and servants etc. and all the payments are accepted and God sends his wrath upon Pharaoh for making a move on another man's wife. Pharaoh sends Sarai back and the couple leaves Egypt with a bunch of riches, because Pharaoh lets them keep the bride-price he paid for the woman he thought he could have. Genesis 12.

What the hell is this? This is a con. History's first long con I dare say. Make the victim think he can buy what he wants, and then sell him what he thinks he wants. And he will be punished for being gullible and you can walk away rich. No, really, it's a perfectly proper thing to do, it's in the Bible. Sell your wife as a bride pretending she's your sister. Perfectly proper, Abram himself did it.

Now, looking past the appalling concept of buying oneself a bride as today that is not what I take exception to, this is the moral compass for so many people. A moral compass that finds it perfectly alrigt to cheat people out of their riches like a common thief - but I suppose it's alright when the victim is Egyptian and the thief is Abram himself, then it's okay.

Come on! What sort of bigoted self-serving crap is this?

Really...

Edit: and it happens again in Genesis 20

Emotional blackmail

2007-12-13T18:40:36Z

I have a habit of watching tv with half an eye while browsing the web. I have no idea what's going on on the screen most of the time, but once in a while a line or a few sentences, maybe even a complete exchange will filter through to register in my brain. This was one of them:

"So, why Las Vegas?"
"It's on my to-do list."
"Oh. So what else is on your to-do list?"
"Four more things left."
"What are they?"
"Sunset in the desert (...) skydiving."
"That's only three."
"I saved the best for last: Make love to first girl I ever kissed."
"Aw, that's so sweet."
"You were the first girl I ever kissed."
"... it may take you some time with that last one there."
"I hope not. I only have a month."
"...?"
"I'm dying of cancer."

And that just made me wanna scream. Did this guy just come asking for a pity-fuck? I think he did. How bloody sad is that? And what's more. She'd feel totally guilty for not returning his affections now that he's in such dire straits. Gee, thanks, dude. This is the kind of crap I'd throw right back into people's faces. Okay, so you're being a sentimental romantic, but it doesn't work any better on people because your health is failing. At least it shouldn't. What is it with the notion that if you're dying you can do and say what you want, you don't have to behave yourself, 'cause you're dying. I've seen it before in people who were very ill (though not necessarily fatally so) or disabled. Because they have that health-wise drawback they think they don't have to treat others decently. They need to think again.

Story from this thing called life:

M and T were dating, had been dating for a few years. In fact they'd gotten engaged. T has a band and together they play gigs here and there. One night after a gig there was to be an afterparty, and ahead of schedule T lets M know that this party might postpone the homecoming to the following day, and was that okay? M's response is this: "Well, I'd rather you'd stay home with me, but I think you should go party with your friends." T assured M that: "If you'd rather have me here I'll come straight home." but M repeated: "Of course I'd rather have you home, I love you, but I still think you should go party with your friends."

Now, at the time M just saw this as being honest with the SO. But later on the emotional blackmail-ish qualities of the exchange became clear. This was not honesty, this was telling T things T did not need to know.

My point is this. We all do this from time to time. If I want people to stay with me, if I want people to go away, if I want people to do something for my sake, I'm gonna tell them that, but if I want people to make ther own decision and I know their preference lies opposite to mine, I shouldn't be telling them my preference. If I want my friend/sibling/you-name-it to do something for themselves for their own sake, I should definitely NOT be telling them what I'd prefer them to do. 'cause that's guilt-tripping them and it only ensures that what they go to enjoy will become an irritant for them because of said guilt, and that would hardly be fair of me.

And that exchange from the tv series was just the worst. One thing is staying home or not, one thing is coming to a party or not, but that exchange was about guilt-tripping a woman into having sex with this guy who's supposedly dying of cancer. If he wanted to make love to her so badly, he can bloody well go and make an honest effort to prove to her that it's a good idea, just like everyone else. Why should she grant him a pity-fuck? Sure he'll get to make love to this woman before he dies. But then what? He'll die, what's the use then?

I'll tell you what the use is. There'll be a woman left alive who might regret sleeping with him, because she really didn't love him, and oh my goodness what if he thought it meant more than it did? It won't matter to him because he's dead, but it'll matter to her, because it's her integrity, and it's her who has to live with it for the rest of her days and those are likely to be a good deal more plentiful than his. It's been proven before that even if a woman does consent to sex, the fact that she does so reluctantly and for the wrong reasons can have the same psychological effects on her as a rape. And that's pretty bloody serious.

Let that be a lesson to us women: We shouldn't allow ourselves to be guilt-tripped into something we're not sure we really want.

But let it also be a lesson to everyone, no matter the gender: Guilt-tripping others into singing your tune is a bad thing to do. Stop it. Not polite. Not the good nor right thing to do. Make it stop. Right. Now.

Emotional blackmail takes the blame for so much crap, everyone ought to put in an effort to kill it. But unfortunately, as long as some individuals might benefit from doing it, they won't stop. Neither respect nor decency is common currency these days. Tsk. Tsk.

An early offer - for once

2007-12-03T19:59:20Z

I have just received an email offering me the job of stage manager on the summer show again in 2008. The director is a woman who acted in the show back in 99 and 2000 and she remembers me and wants to know if I'll be there again. I'm honoured, I'm flattered, but during rehearsal periods it's a bloody full time job - and I already have a full time job. This summer I made a point of not starting my full time occupation till rehearsals were over, and even then my life consisted of nothing more than working sleeping and eating. Getting up at 4.30 AM to go to work. Coming home at 3 PM and then getting a bit of sleep and leaving again at 6.30-ish PM to run the show and getting home at 11 PM to go to bed and sleep a few hours. It was hell, and I was half dead most of the time. And that was only the steady-going shows, that was not in the rehearsal period. That one's always worse.

I like the job, I love working with the actors and other nice people on the set. Every year the organisation behind the show s a pain in the arse, and they are truly incompetent and sometimes infantile idiots who can make a pig's ear of anything and everything. But I do really love the job itself, it's challenging, it's diverse, and it takes xactly those skills I value so greatly in myself. The ability to think on my feet and react quickly to unexpected situations, without losing track of the plans in motion and sticking to them while fixing any problems that might have arisen - and they always do.

So.... ARGH! It's too early for me to make this decision. Especially at this time when I hate my regular full time job because it bores me to death, I'm not sure my head is clear and ready to make the decision, but I do need to make one, because they do need to find someone else if I don't take the job.

On one hand, it's a fun job and I do like it, and I think I may also be hoping somewhat for the possibility of one day making a living of being a stage manager, that'd be totally awesome, but on the other, working for these people is something I've ranted and vented about every year. Every single year, and they never learn from their mistakes, though they are hardly the only ones to be *that* dense.

Either way, I'm in two minds about it.... probably more than two actually.

Meh.... thoughts, thoughts, thoughts. Worries. Doubts. Hopes and fears.

Yes or No? I really truly haven't got an inkling what my answer should or will be.

I've done it again

2007-12-03T18:00:01Z

Yeah, right after NCIS they air America's Next Top Model, so I am guilty of watching it with half an eye. Or rather: listening to it while doing something else.

And today the girls had a jungle shoot with an elephant in Thailand. Very nice scenery (and while I barf at the bad-mouthing and backstabbing I do love the pictures). And of course they interlace the photoshoot with later commentary by the girls. And Jade was on camera saying she loved elephants and then said that "they reminded her of dinosaurs, they are the same family."

OMG you stupid bint. Elephants are MAMMALS! Dinosaurs are reptiles. The difference: Elephants (like all other mammals) birth live offspring and nurse them. Dinosaurs (and all other reptiles) lay eggs. EGGS! Mammals are an entirely different strain of genes! Mammals are called thusly because they have mammaries, reptiles DON'T!

OMG I hope someone tells her how she just embarrassed herself on cam.

Bint...

I think I scared her....

2007-12-01T23:27:37Z

We had a good day with scenario and GM workshop with our RP students. It went really well, and we three teachers went to an Italian restaurant afterwards to have some dinner and a chat.

'Twas nice.

And M and I were telling P about the Alternity campaign of M's that we finished playing in summer. And we regaled him with anecdotes from those merry game days hehe

And I was telling the story of how I secured some explosives and prevented my 'comrades' from selling it to the highest bidder, by tipping off my friend in the navy who sent a black ops team to retrieve the contraband. My cover wasn't blown. And during the telling of that story I noticed a young woman standing by the bar who looked at us strangely.

She had obviousy heard the conversation. And first she looked mildly puzzled, looked like we were somewhat weird. And the second time I saw her looking at us she looked somewhat frightened. Mind ye, my talk of explosives and Alliance Secret Service and such must have sounded quite odd to someone not in on the tale's context lol

Magnificent Come-back

2007-11-26T17:50:52Z

Just channel surfed into America's Next Top Model, Season 6, I think.

This girl, Nnenna, was on the phone, and judging from the cuts with comments from Jade, I think it was, Nnenna ha been having trouble with her boyfriend back at home for some time. So Nnenna is talking to said bf on the phone and these lines are spoken:

The boyfriend: "Why. Can't. You. Love Me."

Nnenna: "Well.... your love seems to be causing me pain right now."

And though Nnenna was generally undecided and completely unable to put her foot down, her comeback to this was just perfect. While I'm no fan of these so-called reality shows, I can very well imagine that the girls are going through immense amounts of pressure, and that boyfriend was just demanding Nnenna's presence while she's competing for her life's dream.

So this was just fantastic. Why can't she just love him? Well, because right now he's not being very lovable. Sometimes things relly *are* simple. And a lot of people - women as well as men - ought to realise that too often the answer to this boyfriend's question is what Nnenna told him. Sometimes there's really no need to ask the question.

Insomnia

2007-11-26T04:28:12Z

It's 5.30 AM and I still haven't slept, though not for lack of trying - I went to bed at 9 PM. I don't dare go to work because I'm probably gonna be a zombie.

This sucks.